The Mistletoe Effect V: Eliot & Parker
by Ultrawoman
Summary: Festive OneShot. The effect of mistletoe on Parker and Eliot; Hardison's plans don't really work out... Set in an AU Season 1 Christmas.


**A/N: So, this is a continuation of a multi-fandom/multi-pairing series I started in 2006, with each story being a one-shot in a different fandom, bringing my fave ship together under the mistletoe. I have different sandboxes to play in these days, and so there is more. Hope you enjoy! Merry Christmas / Happy Holidays to all :)**

_**Disclaimer: All recognisable characters belong to people that aren't me! (but do you think I could have Eliot for Christmas?)**_

The Mistletoe Effect V: Eliot & Parker

_(Takes place in an AU Season 1)_

Hardison was sure it was a plan that couldn't fail. There really weren't that many variables to consider, no danger or anything. It wasn't as if he needed to be some mastermind like Nate to pull it off. The objective was simple, the execution of the plan about to be faultless, there was just no way it could go wrong. The hacker was smiling to himself as he hopped down off the step-ladder and took a look around his newly decorated office. It was tasteful, he thought, in a 'Christmas exploded all over the room' kind of way. Parker would love it, that was all that mattered, and that final detail over the doorway, that would seal the deal.

The overly loud jingly Christmas tunes emanating through the office proved Parker was back from the store. Nate followed her in, bypassing Sophie to go straight for the whiskey bottle. It was understandable given the time of year, and Parker's insane love for the holidays in such an over the top way. Still, it was nice to see her happy, smiling, giddy even. She wasn't that way enough as far as Hardison was concerned.

"Parker!" Eliot yelled from his office door, before the hacker got a chance to do the self same thing. "Turn off the jingle bells crap, some of us are trying to concentrate," he told her snippily.

The thief stuck out her tongue and jacked up the volume to spite him.

"Where's your Christmas spirit, Eliot?" asked Sophie, looking between the two.

"It was knocked outta me by a couple of over-sized Russians last night, remember?" he told the grifter with a pointed look.

Sophie took the hint and advised Parker that maybe she really should turn down the music, just for a little while. Eliot didn't show weakness or even remark on his own pain, but last night was a little too close to a concussion, and blaring music of any kind, Christmas-themed or otherwise, was always going to be unwelcome.

"Hey, Parker," Hardison took the opportunity to call to her then. "You should come see my office," he grinned when she looked his way.

"In a minute," she sighed heavily as she got up from her seat and trudged after Eliot.

Sophie's quiet words in her ear must have been advising that an apology was in order for the hitter. Hardison wasn't best please to have his surprise put on hold but he could deal. In fact, he would go after Parker to make sure Eliot didn't get any more mad at her when she tried to apologise in her own special way. Then after, he could steer her towards his office/grotto and all would end as it was supposed to with a kiss beneath the mistletoe, at least that was the plan.

"Go away, Parker," Eliot called over his shoulder before she had even said a word.

"How did you...?" she asked astonished as he finally looked around at her, removing the glasses he wore to read.

"Distinctive smell of gingerbread cookies and pine needles," he told her with a smirk. "You smell like a whole lotta Christmas, darlin'," he explained.

"Oh," Parker didn't mind hearing that and smiled immediately. "That's cool," she grinned. "Um, but I guess I'm sorry if the music hurt your head. Christmas if for happiness and that means Happy Eliot too, so I'm sorry," she told him, much like a kid who felt bad for being caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

Sometimes that woman was just too damn adorable to bear.

"Don't worry about it," he told her easily, getting up from his seat. "After all, it is almost Christmas and it's not like you meant any harm, right?"

"Right," she nodded her agreement, a little surprised by this non-grumpy side of Eliot but happy to go with it for as long as it lasted. "So, maybe you wanna make Christmas cookies with me?" she asked then.

Eliot had a feeling she was out to drag him into her Christmas festivities from the start and honestly he didn't really mind. They were all each other had right now, weird as their team dynamic was. It seemed to be a given they'd spend the holidays together this year, and it wasn't as if it was going to take much effort for him to bake a few cookies. It might be nice anyway, a little homage to his Momma that he missed this time of year more than any other.

"Sure, we can do that," he nodded, making to follow Parker out of his office, "After all, I let you do this alone, you'll only burn down the kitchen and then we're all screwed."

Neither of them really seemed to notice Hardison hovering round, not until he spoke.

"Hey, before y'all get into baking and everything, Parker, you were gonna come see my office," he reminded her.

"Oh, yeah, sure," the thief agreed, making the hacker smile, as least until he realised she was dragging Eliot behind them by the sleeve.

Hardison stepped into his own office a few moments later, arms wide and face grinning.

"Ta da!" he presented the crazy-decorated room with a flourish, hoping Parker would think it was cool.

The grin on the thief's face sure did prove she was impressed. She loved the tree and the tinsel and the lights. She said as much as she spun a circle in the room, taking in every detail. Eliot hovered in he doorway still, arms folded across his chest as he squinted against way too much light and sparkle.

"Looks like Santa's elves threw up in here," he grumbled, at which Hardison shot him a look.

"You really don't like Christmas at all, do ya?" the hacker snapped.

"Christmas is fine. It's all this commercial crap," Eliot complained. "The plastic ornaments and the fakery," he knocked the synthetic plant above his head aside and it swung wildly from its perch.

Parker looked up at it and frowned.

"What's that for anyway?" she asked in earnest. "That is an ugly plant," she declared as she came to stand by Eliot in the doorway.

"Seriously?" he questioned her sanity as he did on more or less a daily basis. "You've never seen mistletoe before?"

"Oh, mistletoe!" Parker reacted to the name of the plant if not the sight of it.

Hardison was smiling just the same as the thief when they started getting to the point of this whole thing. He took one step forward, his mouth open to explain the significance of the plant, but he never got the chance.

The fact was, Parker knew what mistletoe was for, she'd just never seen the stuff before to be able to recognise it. One minute she was bouncing happily about all the Christmas decorations, the next she had taken Eliot's face in her hands and was kissing him like it was going out of style. The hitter was stunned, to say the least, and yet once he got is bearings he didn't exactly try to get out of the embrace. A hot woman just laid her lips on him, he'd have to be crazy to push her off. Instead he kissed her back until he felt her knees buckle some and her weight fall against him. Yep, even semi-concussed, he was still good.

"Wow," said Parker when they parted. "That mistletoe stuff really works," she smiled, eyes wide and shining as she stared up at Eliot a moment.

"Apparently," he replied, almost unaware that he was still holding onto her, until Hardison cleared his throat.

"Oh, we were gonna make cookies," said Parker then, shaking her head to clear the odd haze that seemed to have settled in it. "Nice office, Hardison," she smiled politely, before dragging Eliot to the kitchen by one hand.

"Yeah, man," the hitter nodded as he was pulled away. "Nice job."

The hacker stared after the pair with his mouth still hanging wide open for a moment. Then he walked up to the doorway and jumped to grab the mistletoe and pull it down.

"Damn stupid parasitic plant!" he complained, throwing it out into the main room.

Sophie jumped when she realised a sprig of mistletoe had just landed in front of her stillettos. Still, she wasn't about to complain about it, she thought, as she eyed Nate across the room. Perhaps it was going to be a Merry Christmas after all!

The End


End file.
